We are brought up believing that sex should always be initiated by men and it’s mostly about pleasing men, notions that are deeply wrong. Here are some common mistakes women make in the bedroom (and any other place one likes to have sex).
Sin #1: Assuming men are ready, and want sex all the time.
This may be true for a teenager with raging hormones, but not with someone who is in his mid-20s, the latter has too much to worry about and that tends to dampen his desire for sex.
Sin #2: Sex is done when he’s done
Not true, you can always turn the tables on him. What’s stopping you from telling him, ‘Hey, we’re not finished yet’? If his orgasm seriously has wiped him out (and in his defence, his body is flooded with ‘sleep’ hormones immediately after orgasm), explain to him that you need to have yours before he does. (What women want in the bedroom)
Sin #3:Sex is more than than just sex to men
Men often have sex to feel wanted. It may be hard for women to accept that it’s a way for men to express affection, but it just might be the case. So, if he really wants to say ‘I love you’, he may suggest sex. If he feels emasculated, sex could make him manly again. If he’s feeling vulnerable after a health scare, sex is his way of proving to himself he doesn’t have to go through it alone. Sometimes when you reject sex, you’re not just rejecting sex but you’re effectively saying ‘I don’t like or want you’. Adopt a new philosophy: don’t say no, say when and always make it clear you’re saying no to sex, not a cuddle or cosy chat. (Top 5 female orgasm myths busted)
Sin #4: Sticking to the same boring routine
You wouldn’t expect your partner to eat the same lunch every day. Why then, do most of us become paranoid when our partner dares to suggest a change to their sexual menu? Wanting change is nothing to be threatened by. (Read: Top sex positions – woman on top)
Sin #5: Not giving enough instructions
If you don’t show or tell him how to touch you—when, where, how hard, how fast, in as much detail as possible—you might as well both give up there and then.