99% of you reading this article have a Facebook account; 50% of you have your Facebook page open in your browser as you are reading this.20% of you check your Facebook when you wake up and before going to sleep!

 If you are one of those people who spends hours on Facebook updating your status and pictures, browsing through your friend’s friends’ albums, checking out potential new friends, installing applications, liking everything, farming and planting and NEED to make life seem like such a la-la-land constantly; you are definitely addicted to Facebook. Because Facebooking has taken precedence over work, family, friends, affecting your personal and professional life.

 Is it time to get a grip and use Facebook as a tool rather than having it validate your life and existence?

 Here are a few tips to fight the Facebook Addiction –

1. Admit it. You are addicted to Facebook. It gives you the same rush, the same heady high of that first cigarette of the day. Admission is the first step to rehabilitation. This applies to any kind of addiction.
2. Be honest with yourself. Your virtual life has taken over your real life. In fact, you end up thinking I need to update/upload this on my profile. Your need to take perfect holiday pictures overrules the actual enjoyment of the holiday. You need to focus on staying in the present.
3. Pause to think before you log on to your account next time – what am I looking for? Why am I here? Making a mental note about what you plan to do once you are logged on gives you a direction to follow. Make a physical note if you must.
4. Reflect on what you did once you logged on – Did I click on random feeds and pictures? Did I upload or commented once I logged on? Reflection will help you assess how much you were able to keep up with your plan. Most importantly, reflect on how you felt about what you did or read. Did it make you feel good or bad about yourself? If the answer to either is yes each time, your self-worth has started to depend on your virtual life rather than the real you.
5. Ask yourself if you can go without Facebook for a day. Remember, you had a life even before Facebook came into existence. Reclaim it. Now your virtual avatar has taken over your real life.    
6. Stop wasting time – decide on time limit before you log on. Set an alarm if necessary. No, setting 2 hours as a limit is not acceptable. No wonder you are addicted. 20 minutes maximum – that’s a good limit. Twice a day should suffice.
7. Start ignoring the pokes and the feeds that are constantly bombarded at you. You don’t have to check every single thing out. And turn those notifications on your smart phones off!
8. Disconnecting your account or the internet connection is an option you can consider. Though, that may not be advisable at the beginning. The withdrawal symptoms would be too much to handle. Instead, you can stop using the Facebook application on your android so frequently. Believe me, out of your 800 odd friends, maybe only 3 really care if you are stuck in traffic or wondering what to cook. 

What you can do is maybe take up ballet dancing. Practice swordplay. Occupy yourself so that you don’t think about Facebook. Do new out-of-the-box things. Get addicted to life! 

Picture Source: The Dummy Page (http://www.facebook.com/TheDummyPage)

• Do your homework Get some information about the various alcoholic beverages served. Look up the common ones. Understand that the alcohol content in them as it varies. Taste a few at home to familiarize and understand what flavours you like and are comfortable with. You can also learn about what kind of drinks goes with what food.
• Pace yourself Sip your drink instead of gulping it down. Set an upper limit beforehand. Two drinks is a good limit. Dilute the stronger drinks with water or juice or cold drinks of your choice.
• Remember to stay hydrated Water is your best friend. Drinking water helps in flushing out the toxins as well as staying sober.
• Don’t mix your drinks It’s not advisable to experiment with different types of alcohol at the same time. It may not suit you. Stick to what you are most comfortable with.
• Eat, drink, and be merry Snacking on food items helps in controlling the intoxication that comes along with drinking alcohol. Foods high in protein slow down the absorption of alcohol into our system. Never drink on an empty stomach as you may get intoxicated faster. Remember that drinks are accompaniments to food, not the other way around.
• Be aware of yourself Be aware of where you are and what is your role there. Notice the way you handle your drink. Remember that alcohol consumption lowers your inhibitions and dulls your senses. Hence, it is very important to know when to say NO.
• Saying No You can say “No” to social drinking every once a while. You don’t have to drink just because everyone else is. Don’t drink if you don’t feel like it. Have a soft drink instead.

Too much of anything is bad. Repetitive usage makes it a habit. When you cannot do without that habit, it becomes an addiction. When your life starts revolving around that habit, it becomes an addiction. When your personal, professional and social life gets impaired because of that habit, it becomes an addiction.

There is no compulsion to drink alcoholic beverages. You can stick to juices or aerated non – alcoholic beverages or water when you attend social events. It is your choice.

So if you choose to be a social drinker, keep it to that. It’s when you start using social outings as an excuse to drink; you are a step away from getting addicted.

Here’s a quick guide to some of the common alcoholic beverages available and served –

Alcoholic Beverage – Alcohol Content*
Wine Between 9% to 16% (most often 12.5% –14.5%)
Beer Between 2% to 12% (usually 4% – 6%)
Rum Between 37.5% to 80%
Vodka Between 35% to 50% (usually 40%)
Brandy Between 35%–60% (usually 40%)
Whisky 40%–55% (usually 40% or 43%)
Gin Between 40% to 50%

The ideal number of drinks shouldn’t exceed more than 2 glasses. If the event goes on for a longer duration, switch to water or soft drinks.  Remember addiction is bad and it’s your duty to keep it at bay. Here’s to responsible drinking. 
*source: Wikipedia

2nd October is National Anti-Drug Addiction Day.

Drugs are one of the greatest vices of our society. Drug addicts literally lose the ability to make rational decisions and getting the next ‘hit’ takes precedence over everything else – career, family, loved ones, friends and even laws.  They tend to spend every waking hour craving for a ‘fix’. To try and get money somehow, anyhow, by any means, to supply to that habit. To not bother about anything but that ‘feeling’ that nothing else matters. Even a drug addict knows they are spiralling towards destruction but are unable to control it.

Most people have experimented with ‘controlled substances’ at some point in their lifetime. People experiment with drugs either out of curiosity, or to be part of a social circle, or to have a good time. Some use it to enhance and improve their athletic performances, while some succumb to peer-pressure and just want to be ‘cool’. Sometimes people given are given drugs to alleviate medical problems – like pain or depression – and they get addicted to those medicines as well.

It is when the user gets to the other end of the spectrum, where drugs become more of a necessity to function rather than an aid to functioning is when abuse begins. When the usage of drugs starts causing problems in your social, personal and professional life, you have a drug addiction problem.

It may be difficult to deal with and recover from drug addiction, but it is not impossible. 

These are the ways you can deal with a drug addiction problem:

• Acceptance - Be ready to put a cap on your problem. Decide that you want to make a change and STOP using drugs. The desire to get better helps fight the addiction better.
• Take support - Start being honest with yourself and your loved ones. Support is very essential for recovery. When you have the support of your loved ones, treatment and recovery becomes emotionally easier. You know you can lean on them for encouragement, security, comfort and guidance.
• Rehabilitation - Rehabilitation is an important part of the treatment. The treatment for dealing with drug addiction is not just kicking the habit. It involves addressing various aspects of your life including personal and professional life. It also involves getting ready to face the world again. It primarily involves getting rid of your dependence on a substance which caused you to think, act and feel differently which was harmful to yourself and the society.
• Address the issue - Dealing with the addiction also means that you have to address the issue that led you to your drug habit. It may have been for any number of reasons mentioned above. And those triggers may still appear in your life. You need to find a healthy way to deal with these issues. The feelings that you were trying to hide from by using drugs will start resurfacing. You have to learn to deal with them in a healthier manner. Consider Psychotherapy and Counselling.
• Support groups - Join a support group and attend the meetings regularly. When you interact with people who have a similar problem, their stories and experiences will encourage you as they know exactly what you are going through.
• Stay away from addicts - Change your social circle if they are the ones who got you into this habit in the first place. Your chances of successfully dealing with the addiction are higher if you are away from all temptations and people who can lead you to such temptation. Let that include old drinking buddies or bars and pubs.
• Distract yourself  - Keep yourself busy and occupied. Pick a new hobby. Get a pet. Get more involved with the community. Set new goals. Relapse can be effectively prevented when you feel you have meaning to your life and that you are needed. You don’t need drugs when you feel good about yourself and who you are.
• No quick-fix - You have to understand and accept that there is no quick-fix solution. Recovery is a process and it’ll take time, effort and patience. You have to be committed to the goal and have to follow through the process of recovery.

You may have been pushed into rehabilitation by you family. This was because you didn’t have the mental capacity to take a decision to get better. Once the effects of the drugs start wearing off your system, you’d be able to think clearly. You’d be able to see how your substance dependence was affecting all the different facets your life, your future and how negatively it affected the ones close to you. You won’t just ruin, probably end, your life. You will realise that you were also destroying the lives of people close to you. This is the wakeup call you required. Be the master of your own destiny; not a slave to substances.

The recent Satyamev Jayate episode brought forward some questions that we tend to ignore about alcoholism. Addictions are dependent on external factors to feel a misplaced sense of control. It doesn’t matter what form the addiction is in.

Each addiction that takes you away from yourself is equally bad. Let that be gaming, sniffing glue, narcotics, smoking or drinking. The addiction begins in the first place because you want to escape your reality. What you get in return is a temporary sense of relief. What it takes from you is your life. Only you don’t realise it. Chronic alcoholism is a disease. However, unlike other diseases, it cannot be easily fixed by popping a pill. It can happen suddenly and doesn’t give you the impression that you’re out of control.

Adverse health effects of over-consumption

It’s not considered a disease by many.

Ill effects

The effects of alcoholism are far-reaching. Because of alcoholism, the alcoholic can suffer lot of health issues. It includes:

• poor nutrition,
• memory disorders,
• difficulty with balance and walking,
• liver disease (including cirrhosis and hepatitis),
• high blood pressure,
• muscle weakness (including the heart),
• heart rhythm disturbances,
• anaemia,
• clotting disorders,
•  decreased immunity to infections,
• gastrointestinal inflammation and irritation,
• acute and chronic problems with the pancreas,
• low blood sugar,
•  high blood fat content,
• interference with reproductive fertility, erectile dysfunction in men
• increased risk of cancer of the liver, oesophagus, and breast,
• weakened bones,
• Sleep disturbances, anxiety, and depression.

In other words, the overall nervous systems, gastrointestinal system, brain, heart and liver as well as the reproductive system get affected.

Social effects

Alcoholics have problems in their personal lives as well. They often have difficulties in marital and other relationships. Alcoholics can have anger issues which lead to domestic violence. There are also chances of child abuse or neglect. Alcoholics also have difficulty finding or keeping a job, show impaired school or work performance and are involved in legal problems such as driving while intoxicated causing destruction of life and property. An impaired sense of judgment can lead to breaking the law or stealing to support the habit. They lose the ability to judge between right and wrong. This affects the society at large.

Drug like effects

Alcohol is not a stimulant. It actually has a sedative outcome. It has narcotic effect on the controlling centres of the brain. Hence the words “alcohol helps you loosen your inhibitions”. Speech, thoughts, actions flow freely. It kind of helps one relax. This is the reason why most people drink. But for many, this effect is an escape. Alcohol allows them to forget about what problems they may be facing. It dulls their pain centre.

The composition of the brain chemistry has a part to play in turning someone into chronic alcoholics. Because of constant drinking, the composition gets altered to a great extent. Drinking becomes a necessity for alcoholics to feel in control. Alcoholics crave for their next drink just like drug addicts crave for their next fix.

In today’s world, social drinking is an acceptable norm. Alcoholic beverages served in parties act as an aid to conversations. It is often the individuals who use alcohol as a crutch.

Teenagers, for instance, experiment with alcohol without a second thought. The adverse effects of alcohol, like cigarettes, cannot be seen immediately. It adds to the “coolness” factor and they are accepted in their circles. But for troubled teenagers, alcohol can become a lifeline. Similarly, for adults, those who consume drinks to de-stress themselves, would often be seen drinking more alcohol to feel relaxed. This is one of the symptoms of an alcoholic – tolerance for alcohol increases and hence consumption increases to achieve the desired effect.

Why some people drink more than others

Interestingly, all who consume alcohol do not become alcoholics. Their individual environmental factors as well as their genetic make-up play a major role in this. If an individual already has unresolved issues relating to childhood, family or has experienced traumatic events, they may have a greater tendency to get hooked onto drinking as alcohol eases away the sense of self. Also, if they come from a background of alcohol abuse, chances of falling into similar pattern is high.

Binge drinking

At the same time, there are individuals who indulge in binge drinking; they drink till they pass out. They do it for fun and live under the impression that this once in a while indulgence won’t harm them. But their system starts getting used to the alcohol. And the next time you’d require more alcohol to have fun. Binge drinking leads to higher tolerance levels which takes a toll on their health.

Like mentioned before, chronic alcoholics do not think they have a problem. But if you have tried to cut down on drinking unsuccessfully, or get annoyed when someone comments on your drinking habits, or you feel guilty about drinking or require to have another drink to “wake up” the next morning, you are on your way to becoming an alcoholic.

Kicking the bottle -

• Detoxification. Stop your alcohol drinking abruptly. But this requires assistance of medications to prevent effects of alcohol withdrawal. Detoxification has to be a monitored process for better results. One may get themselves enrolled to a detoxification centre. Chronic alcoholics shouldn’t be under the impression that they can start out by slowly reducing their intake. A gradual withdrawal from alcohol. If they could manage this on their own, they wouldn’t be alcoholics in the first place.
• Joining support groups. Detoxification is only the first step towards recovery. Temptations are available everywhere. The patient must have support to get through this addiction and stay away from the same. Support groups let the patient know that they are not alone in this. Sharing experiences help the patient to gain a better insight to their problem and how to fight it. Alcoholics Anonyms (AA) is one such group with its 12 step recovery program.
• Ask your loved ones to support you. If you are on the road to recovery, request your friends and family to help you stay away from alcohol. This would probably mean hosting get-togethers without alcoholic drinks. There is no need to test your will power when you have just started recovery. Avoiding a relapse is very important.
• Other methods to manage stress. If you had used alcohol to manage your stress, it is time to move on to other methods of managing stress. Some therapies include massage, meditation, hypnotherapy, yoga, and acupuncture.
• Psychotherapy is another medium to manage your problems. To use your life experiences as a reason for drinking alcohol, is not a reason good enough. You are only creating new problems for yourself. Recognise this and get the required help.

There’s nothing wrong in relaxing with a drink after a long day at work. But when that drink becomes the highlight of the day, you have a problem. So the next time you take a sip of that drink, ask yourself “Who’s in charge? You or the bottle?”

As the formalities of the wedding ceremony and reception nears an end, the anticipation of the wedding night builds for the newlyweds. The friendly banter and the innuendos by friends and relatives add on to it. It is assumed that all newlyweds look forward to this night of union.

Though for some, the thought of consummating the marriage brings on anxiety.

Anxiety can be on various levels for both men as well as women. It can range from questions like,“Can I satisfy my spouse?” to “What will she/he think of me?” to “what exactly am I supposed to do?” to as simple as “will it hurt?”

Anxiety can stem from a number of factors like self–doubt, fears, misconceptions, unawareness, lack of information as well as unrealistic expectations. There are simple ways to deal with it:

• Start with setting aside some alone time to tackle this issue head-on. Ignoring it or pretending that it is not important will not make it go away.
• Be honest with yourself. Ask yourself what exactly is making you anxious. Is it the idea of sex or the act in itself? Is it your inhibitions and shyness? Is it self-doubt? Is it that you are afraid of it? Or do you feel it is an act establishing approval or accomplishment?
• Talk to your friend or close ones. Tell them about what is making you anxious. You may get their perspective as well as suggestions on how to handle the anxiety.
• Get proper information about what to expect, especially if you haven’t been involved in a sexual relationship before. Clear your doubts and become aware of what you can expect.
• Talk to your partner. Though today’s generation doesn’t blink twice at the mention premarital sex, there are couples who prefer to consummate their relationship after they get married. Talk to each other about what you expect the first night to be like. Talk even about birth control methods. Try to be open and confide about what you are looking forward to and what you are apprehensive about. This won’t just make you aware about each other, but will also help your partner to be sensitive to your needs and vice versa.
• Try not to get bogged down by expectations – internal or external. Remember that the first night is not about proving yourself. Especially for men. This has nothing to do with proving your manhood. Don’t get trapped in that cycle.
• Relax. Remember that you have the rest of your married lives to find out more about each other at every level – mentally, emotionally, physically, spiritually and sexually. It is not necessary you consummate your marriage on the first night itself. That is an expected notion. It doesn’t have to be your notion. Though do remember to communicate your thoughts to your spouse and be open to their thoughts as well.
• Undergoing premarital sex counselling also helps in reducing the anxiety and in understanding yourself better. You can be assured that your fears and anxieties will be addressed to in a professional manner, providing you with the insight you require.

It becomes easier to deal with the anxiety when you understand that the marriage is not just about the first night, it is about everything that follows after. It is not just about creating a memorable night; it is about creating a memorable life together.

Read: Revealed – the average size of the Indian penis!

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Of all the life-threatening illnesses that are present, being infected with AIDS brings about a stigma that no other illness does. Lack of information adds to this stigma. Rejection and social ostracism aggravates the plight of the infected patients.

Having AIDS doesn’t just bring the patient’s life to a standstill; it affects the patient’s family and loved ones as well. The false notion that you can catch the virus by associating by the patient is still prevalent. It is this ignorance that leads to the patients being avoided and discriminated against. It is also ignorance about how actually the virus spreads, makes one vulnerable to it.

The infections or illnesses that come in the wake of AIDS can be treated to a certain extent. Though, it is more like buying time. The patient can take care of themselves by being regular with their medication, proper nutrition, therapy to deal with the illness and an attempt to live as normally as then can. And all that you can do for someone whom you know has AIDS, is to support them.

You can start by –

1. Accepting – abandoning the person or being judgmental is the worst thing you can do when they have shared this private information with you. This will break the morale of the patient and make them feel diseased. Accept the information and the person and help them deal with the condition with your support.
2. Talking – talk to the patient. Share your thoughts and feelings. They, too, may be feeling that way or ten times more. Sharing will help you understand each other’s’ fears and doubts. It will also let the patient know that they are not alone and you are there with them.
3. Being well-informed – read up literature to understand the facts about the illness. No one dies because of AIDS. People die because of the infections and secondary diseases that are caused due to a weak immune system. The body’s defense system collapses and leaves it susceptible to attacks from any form of infection to any part of the body.
4. Hand holding the patient – remember that the patient is traumatized with the infection. They require emotional support and understanding from their loved ones. This will give them the boost they require to keep their spirits up.
5. Joining support groups – this helps in coping with the illness – not just for the patient but also for the close ones of the patient. It helps you better in dealing with the situation – mentally and emotionally. To have a support system to fall back onto makes it a little easier to cope with what the illness brings.
6. Getting self-therapy – having your loved one suffering with AIDS would take a toll on you. There may be a wide range of emotions felt including anger and shame. Because of the stigma associated with AIDS, you may not be comfortable sharing the news of the illness with other friends – something which you may have done in case of another life – threatening illness like cancer. Visiting a psychotherapist will help you understand and manage yourself better.

At the end of it all, it is this love, understanding and support extended towards a patient suffering from AIDS that gives them the courage to fight the illness.

Nathalie is in her 50s. Her children have grown up and settled. Her husband passed away recently. She has very few friends and mostly keeps to herself. Since her early 20s, Nathalie used to suffer from backaches. She could barely walk and used to be bed-ridden for days. She also developed asthma around this time. She still suffers from these problems today. All the medical tests and reports were inconclusive and nothing seemed to be wrong with her physically. The doctor then suggested a psychological evaluation. There, it was learnt that Nathalie’s husband had been physically and emotionally abusive. Since theirs was a love marriage, she felt she couldn’t stand up to him and had bottled in her feelings of sadness, guilt, betrayal, anger deep within her. She stayed with him for the sake of their children. Even after her husband passed away, these feelings remained. She is now learning how to deal with these emotions and is on the road to physical and emotional recovery.

Emotions can be categorised as positive emotions and negative emotions. Some makes us feel good and others make us feel bad. We find it easy to deal with the positive emotions. However, we often are lost when dealing with negative emotions. Anger, sadness, pain, despair, grief are the ones that most of us have trouble dealing with. Children until the age of five throw tantrums to express their inner turmoil. They don’t know what’s appropriate and what’s not. Grown-ups, on the other hand, bottle up their feelings. The reasons are numerous. Sometimes you feel it is not the right time or place to express, or at other times, you feel that you are bound by some unspoken rules of conduct and courtesy, or you may be in a position that undermines your authority and position – like at your work or at school.

 Whatever the case maybe, you end up feeling frustrated, angry, or sad. Instead of dealing with those emotions, you end up pushing it into the deep recesses of your mind. You tell yourself, “It’s okay, no big deal. Such things happen. Maybe I deserved it. I am okay.” Time goes on and you make it a habit to integrate and absorb such feelings into you system.

 However, you need to remember, that there is a limit. You can only take in till a certain point. After that, you will overflow or burst with the tension and pressure. If emotions and feelings are not expressed constructively, you will notice the repercussions in your day-to-day life.

Road rage, displacing anger, psychosomatic disorders as well as psychological disorders are all symptoms of bottling up and suppressing your emotions. If you take note of your behaviour, you’d notice that you get irritated at the smallest of things, shout at you children, friends and spouses and even experience some physical symptoms like aches and pains. If you do not address the core issue, you may end up spoiling your relationships or with chronic mental and physical illnesses. You don’t seem to get relief with any kind of treatment either.

It is not always possible to express to the person who causes these emotions – like your boss or your parents or your spouse. That doesn’t mean you build these emotions inside you or try to put a lid on it. One day these emotions will spill out and it won’t be pretty. You need to learn to express your negative emotions. Find a safe place where you can express freely without worrying about hurting yourself or anyone else. It can be your closest friend, your psychotherapist, your diary or even your pillow. Cry, scream, grumble, punch, talk – do anything that will help you let go of these emotions. It’s something you need to do to preserve your sanity and peace of mind.

If you are bored of living the same monotonous drill that has become your marriage, it is time to infuse some freshness into the relationship:

• Go on a Date – Rediscover yourselves and each other. Meet for a drink or play pretend games and pick up each other at the bar. Talk about anything except for your family, kids, bills – what you deal with once you get home. Remember how the initial days of courtship were and aim to recreate that magic…
• Express your love more often by gestures, kisses and more importantly, words! Say “I love you” and look into each other’s eyes when you do so.
• Keep in touch…literally. Touch your partner more often when out in public. Holding hands, impromptu hugs, touching face, hair, shoulder…anything. These non-sexual but comforting actions tell your partner how much you like being connected to them. Don’t shy away – let your children see and feel how much you love, care and respect each other.
• Keep surprising your partner – Stop taking your partner for granted. Plan a surprise at least once a week. It can be anything – as simple as a love note and a flower or as extravagant as a weekend trip to an exotic location.
• Do things on a whim! Let that be walking in the rain or bunking work and going for a movie. You need to put the craziness back into your relationship.
• Take up dancing – it is never too late to put on your dancing shoes! Choose to learn any form of dancing involving couples like salsa or ballroom dancing or tango. This will not only help you shed your inhibitions but also connect with each other on a different physical and passionate level. 
• Ask your partner to teach you something that they are good at…cooking, painting, changing tires. This shows that you acknowledge their mastery over something and are willing to learn from them. You end up spending more time with each other and start appreciating their skills. Remember to be patient with each other or this exercise is futile!
• We have heard of whispering small nothings into each other’s ears. Now do small nothings. Read out favourite poetry or books aloud. Write letters. Gaze at the stars. Go for a stroll on the beach. Cuddle up and watch the rain.
• Start paying attention to yourself – Don’t be lazy about your appearance. Your partner is important enough for you to shave before the movie date or put on your Sunday best.

Small things make all the difference to keep that spark alive. Get out of your comfort zone. Stop making excuses of lack of time and energy. Find a solution to those excuses. Your partner and your marriage are worth that effort!

Are you one of those women for whom the word “impossible” doesn’t exist?

You face each task, each challenge with a fervour that surprises the world! You zoom around doing everything, from the most mundane everyday chores to the most challenging jobs which include the jolts that come by once in a while. The word “NO” is something you are not familiar with. Apart from this, you play the roles of wife, mother, daughter, sister, daughter-in-law, friend and colleague to the T.

 Everyone who knows you thinks you’re a superwoman.

 But dear Superwoman, everyone, even you, needs to take it a little easy once in a while. Or you are definitely heading towards burnout. Slow down a bit and learn how you can recharge your batteries.

Also read: International Women’s Day 2013: Top 5 fitness tips for women

 Start by taking out some time out for yourself!

That is step one. You are so used to doing things for others that you have forgotten about what you want. Taking time out for yourself doesn’t make you a bad or selfish person. On the contrary, you will be able to focus better – on your tasks as well as on your relationships.

 Now that you have taken out time for yourself, here are some suggestions to make the best it:

 Meditate…Be still, for a change. Instead of doing a hundred things, take some time out for reflection and introspection. Watch the clouds move across the sky or the rain pattering against your window, inner peace is something you can do with. 

Treat yourself right…Indulge in some pampering. Go to the nearest salon, get a hair spa or foot spa done or let those professional masseuses knead out the knots from your tired muscles. As a do-it-yourself option, draw yourself a hot bath with those scented oils and salts and soak your bones in it with scented candles relaxing your senses.

 Work out…Any physical form of exercise will help you get those endorphins up and running. You can choose between your local gym, an aerobics class or jazz it up by learning a dance form! Salsa, jive, tango, pole dancing – there’s so much to choose from! Remember to eat right. Skipping meals is not an option for self-preservation.

Girls’ night out…Girlfriends are a blessing to have. Round up your close buddies and go out regularly. Gear up in your best and catch up with all that has been happening! I’m sure your husband won’t mind watching the kids while you are out painting the town red with your BFFs. It is, after all, for the greater good!

Also read: International Women’s Day 2013: Top 10 beauty problems women face

 Retail therapy…What better way to unwind than to buy yourself some pretty goodies! Go invest in a good pair of shoes or phone. Freak out on the new arrivals. Keeping a budget in mind would help. Though window shopping is just as much fun and doesn’t cost a penny!

 Pick a hobby…Find something you are passionate about and pursue it with vigour. Like painting or photography or stitching or pottery or astronomy. You may have many talents that you are still unaware of!

Date yourself…It is perfectly okay to enjoy a movie and a dinner by yourself. Read a book while sipping coffee. Go to that art exhibition or museum or drive around aimlessly. You don’t always require company to go out.

You are your best friend. Take care of yourself. It will equip you better to take care of your loved ones and your situations.

So go on, give this a try! Your world will still be standing when you get back to it. Waiting for you to work your miracles on it!  

Also read: Women’s Day Special: Fitter, Sexier Healthier

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 This Valentine’s Day sex is on the table. There is no point denying it.  And it is very important to know everything about all the different birth control methods before you decide to have sex.  The decision to choose when to procreate has its basis not only on having heirs but also on financial stability, maturity of the couple involved and the readiness to take on a different gamut of responsibilities.

There are many birth control methods to choose from. As a couple, you need to decide on what form of birth control to practise. These are few things you can keep in mind –

• Consult your gynaecologist to get complete and error free information about the various methods of birth control – either as a couple or individually. If you are choosing to consult a gynaecologist individually, remember to share the information with your partner. It is, after all, the collective responsibility of the couple.
• There is no hard and fast rule that you have to follow only one method of birth control throughout the life of your sexual relationship. You can try a combination of methods, to see what suits you best. But try only one method at a time.
• Birth control can be achieved either by preventing fertilization or by preventing the implantation or by abortion. The couple needs to be aware what each type is and more so, how effective each type is. They also need to be aware if it has any side effects on their health – especially for the women.
• Condoms and diaphragms help in preventing fertilization. They are used during sex and either prevent the sperm from fertilizing the egg. Diaphragms can be used multiple times and has to be cleaned between uses. Depending on usage and storage, diaphragms can be replaced between every year to three years. Condoms, on the other hand, mustn’t be reused as the latex can undergo degradation and may even form tears. There are female condoms available as well.
• Prescriptive birth control methods, like oral contraceptives also aid in preventing the fertilization. It should be ideally followed under medical supervision. Ensure you follow the recommended course for the desired results while using this method.
• If you choose to use Behavioural methods be aware that they are not fool proof. Though, withdrawal method can act as birth control methods, it can result into pregnancy if there is pre-ejaculation. Natural family planning method like following the menstrual cycles to have intercourse can act as birth control method as well. Though any miscalculations about the cycles can lead to pregnancy.
• Sterilization methods are quite popular and effective as a birth control technique. Either the woman can choose to undergo tubal ligation or the man can undergo vasectomy. It involves surgeries and can be reversed if desired.
• Morning-after pills have become a popular method of birth control method. Used after unprotected sex, these pills guarantee to curb unwanted pregnancy. Though convenient and easy to use, this has to be used as little as possible since popping in too many of these pills can have an adverse effect on the health of the woman.
• If you are uncomfortable using a particular method of birth control, communicate the same with your partner. Some methods of birth control can have side effects to the hormones and overall health of the person.
• Be able to differentiate the facts from the myths. Hence if you have any doubts about birth control methods, consult an expert like a doctor for clarifications.

So this Valentine’s Day it’s better to be safe, than sorry. Have a fun Valentine’s Day and a  more wicked night.